Capture Your Grief - Day 11, Altar

I don't really have what I would call an altar in my home in honor of Faith.  However, I do have a few items that represent her sitting on top of the dresser in our bedroom, so that is sort-of an altar.  

I think eventually I'll get a nice shelf or something to place her items on, but for now, this is nice.

The items that are on the dresser are (from left to right) a beautiful April angel figurine that my sister-in-law sent to us recently, a precious angel holding a baby figurine that a friend gave to us before we moved, the balloon weight from the due date balloons that we released on August 3rd in honor of Faith, and a cute little pink hat sent to us from Calvin's Hats.

All of these items are precious to my heart and remind me of my beautiful Faith.  The angels are special to me, as they came from family and friends.  I also know that Faith is now surrounded by angels now.  I was thinking of decorating her room with angels, and I may still do so.  I think that may be a great way to decorate my office to remind me of Faith.

When I go past the dresser, I look at these items and think of my beautiful daughter.  So for now, until I create a special shelf or decorate my office, these items on my dresser, are my "altar" for Faith.

Capture Your Grief - Day 6 - Books

Books...that is today's Capture Your Grief prompt.  Since Faith died, I haven't read a lot of books.  I am not a huge reader, although I do enjoy reading, when something really peaks my interest.  That being said, there are two books that I have read since April 15, that have been very good for me in this journey.

1) Mommy, Please Don't Cry...by Linda Deymaz

2) Princess Faith's Mysterious Garden by Jeanna Young & Jacqueline Johnson

We had two friends send us the Mommy, Please don't cry book.  Although it is very good, it should be Mommy & Daddy, but I digress.  This book is very well written and talks about how great Heaven is and how your child is doing well. 

My Mother-In-Law gave me the Princess Faith book this Mother's Day.  It is a very precious book that is a story of a princess named Faith and how she plants, loves, and takes care of a beautiful garden.  

I have a feeling that our Princess Faith is in Heaven taking care of her mysterious, beautiful garden.  I am sure there are many beautiful flowers and animals in her garden.  

Both of these books help me to escape the world and focus on Faith and to remember her as the Princess that she is.

I think books are a great way to not only learn new things, but also to escape and relax.  I am certain that I will continue to read more books, as I move forward on my journey of love, loss, and healing.  

I would love suggestions of books that have helped you on your journey.

15th of the Month...

Well, today is the 15th again.  Another month has gone by, and it has now been 5 months since Faith was born.  It is so strange and surreal that Faith has come into our lives and gone home to Heaven. The 15th will forever be a special day for me.  I have gone through so many emotions, some of which I do not understand myself.

I know that I continue to play what happened that day over and over in my mind.  I may always on the 15th of the month.  I do not know.  But I also know that as the seconds, minutes, hours, and days go by, my love for Faith continues to grow far beyond what I can even describe.

Faith will always be my beautiful baby girl.  I think of her constantly and want nothing more than to hold her in my arms again.

Today, and every 15th of every month, I will remember Faith's precious life with us and think of the glorious day when we'll hold each other again.

When I look at pictures of Faith, I am constantly drawn in by how beautiful her little body is.  I can close my eyes and remember the soft touch of her skin, the perfection of her small hands and feet, her beautiful soft auburn hair...

...but most of all, I can close my eyes and remember all those things, and feel the never-ending love that I felt as I held the most precious gift I have ever held in my arms...

...my darling daughter, My Faith Melody.