Capture Your Grief - Day 25 - Earth Remembrance

Earth Remembrance, that is yesterday's Capture Your Grief topic.  I got a day behind, so I am catching up!!  Gotta stick with it!  

Last year, my husband and I planted this beautiful red hibiscus plant in our backyard in honor and memory of Faith.  It is now very tall and beautiful.  I will have to post a more recent picture of it soon, but wanted to share this picture with this particular post.  I really like this picture a lot.  I look at myself in this picture and remember that through all the pain of losing Faith, I am still mostly a happy person.  Faith still brings happiness to me, even though she lives in Heaven.  I look at this plant daily and think of my beautiful daughter.  It grows and blooms, just as my love for Faith does. 

I believe planting a plant or tree in honor of a loved one is a great idea, especially if you can see it often.  It does something wonderful for your soul.  I am not sure why, but it does.  It's as if you watch yourself growing right along with the plant in your grief journey.  

I will continue to look at this beautiful plant every day and think of Faith...

Capture Your Grief - Day 12 - Normalizing Grief

Normalizing Grief...that is today's Capture Your Grief topic.  As I take a look at my grief journey, I suppose the thing that I look at as "strange" is that I slept with the teddy bear that was with Faith in the hospital for the entire year after she died.  I still find enormous comfort in holding this bear, although I no longer sleep with it every night.  It is strange to me that I slept with it every night for so long, and yet, it is not strange.  I don't know if that even makes sense, but it does to me.  

With every passing day, I read about others' grief journeys and realize more and more that there is no "normal" way to go through loss.  It is normal to grieve, but we all do it in so many different ways.  I am also learning that like everything else in life, my grief changes sometimes by the minute, hour, and of course by the day.  Sometimes I choose to look back, remember, cry, and grieve.  Other times, it sneaks up on me in an uncontrollable wave of emotions.  Each time is different and yet special.

I know this teddy bear will always be one of my most prized possessions.  This bear and the outfit I dressed Faith in on the day she was born, are the only items I have that touched her.

I love and miss you so much Faith.

Capture Your Grief - Day 11 - Glow In The Woods

Today's Capture Your Grief topic is Glow In The Woods.  Goodness...so many people have been a light for me on my grief journey since losing Faith...family, friends, etc...

My husband has been a great light for me in my journey.  He is so loving and supportive.  I don't know where I would be or what I would have done without his love and support.  I have read of so many marriages that fail after such a tragedy as losing a child.  I am so thankful that God blessed me with Owen.

The most important light for me on my grief journey has been The Lord.  I have had so many days when grief has overtaken me and I felt alone.  No matter the time of day or night, I have always found comfort in The Lord and He has held my hand and guided me through.  His unconditional love has gotten me through some very sad and lonely times since Faith has passed.  I believe part of what makes Him my greatest light is knowing that He is raising Faith.  I couldn't ask for a better teacher for her, that is for sure.  I know that Jesus is the first person Faith saw when she opened her eyes for the first time and that makes me smile.  

"He is my Light & Salvation"

Capture Your Grief - Day 29 - Reflect

Reflect...that is today's Capture Your Grief prompt.  When I reflect back at the month of October, I am realizing that it has been a very good month as far as my grief journey.  I must say that doing this project has been very good for me.  

Each day I have written a blog post on the prompt provided.  Doing so has helped me to view losing Faith in a different way, whether it was focusing on new hobbies that I've started or feeling closer to Faith through nature.  

Tonight, I take a moment to REFLECT on what Faith means to me.  She is still my pride and joy. She will be forever.  I love her more each day and along with that love, I miss her more every day.  I remember a line from Return to Zero when Minnie Driver says that if she quiets herself down she can almost hear her son.  I feel the same way about Faith.  I can almost feel and hear her when I quiet myself down and get into His peace.

So, in reflecting back on this month, I am thankful for this project.  I am thinking about a "project" of some sort that I can do to continue to stay on track with my healing journey.  My picture for today's blog post is one that I took of the necklace I ordered because of participating in the Sacred Project.  I am so excited about this project and SO thankful for the beautiful necklace.  It is so pretty and shiny, so I think it is a great way to capture life's reflections...today, I reflect...

Capture Your Grief - Day 17 - Explore

Explore is today's Capture Your Grief prompt. 

I've done a lot of exploring in the last six months since Faith went to Heaven; exploring in many ways and in many areas of my life.  

My picture for today is of a lap desk that my husband got me and it is a very good reminder.

When life gets me down and I need lifting up, I need to continue to remember to sing to The Lord and it makes life so much better.  

In all of my exploring thus far and my exploring I have yet to do in this journey, I know this for sure, The Lord is where I find my peace.  That is where I am and where I will stay in my grief journey...I will continue to find my rest in Him.