I can sit for hours thinking of different scenarios. What if the doctors would have done a C-section the day before? What if I would have done something different? What if the doctors would have seen my complication sooner? What if this... What if that...
My husband and I have a saying: "This is the what if". Those things are NOT what happened. THIS is what happened. This is the life we live. It is so easy for me to question everything surrounding losing Faith, thinking it is my fault, doctors' fault, someone's fault. The bottom line is this, everyone did all they could. I did nothing wrong.
What if, instead of thinking "what if", I use my experience to help others. Faith lives in Heaven now. She is not here to express her love to the world. It is my honor to be her mother and share her love with you. That is what she would want me to do, so WHAT IF I do that?
THIS is the what if.
WHAT IF Faith's life can be used to help others going through the despair of losing a child?
WHAT IF every day I decide to honor Faith by sharing her story instead of being depressed?
WHAT IF I miss Faith more every day, but along with that, my love for her grows more each day as well?
WHAT IF you read this post and decide to reach out to someone else going through pain?
WHAT IF somehow I can turn losing Faith into making myself a better person for the world?
WHAT IF Faith's life can lead someone to Salvation?